My daddy was not nice to me! Okay?
Dragon Age Inquisition got pushed back to Nov 18th, which is obviously not my birthday. Taking this as a sign as well, though not a good one as I hear some LIs are only available to certain sexes. Ah well, as long as I have someone who doesn’t annoy me and the combat isn’t as terrible as Origins (a game where you have to spam killallhostiles just to keep it interesting) I suppose I’ll be happy.
I don’t get ship wars.
Like, what is the point of gettin angry about what particular fictional characters you think should be doing the horizontal tango?
People get upset about who people they don’t even know do the horizontal tango with. Explain that one to me.
There’s a GOT joke I want to make and it’s very much a spoiler so I’m putting it behind a cut. I could have waited but this has been in my head since yesterday so here you go:
Bold what applies
I have blond hair.
My current hair color is not my natural hair color.
I have curly hair.
I have green eyes.
I have red hair.
I have natural highlights.
I am black.
I have lots of freckles.
My nails are usually painted.
I wear a lot of eye make-up.
I have bangs.
I have short hair.
I wear a lot of pink.
I own a hair straightener.
I have my own car.
I have posters on my walls.
I have a pet.
I own a pair of roller skates or blades.
I have lots of bobby pins.
I own at least four bottles of perfume.
I have a lot of jewelry I never wear.
I own at least 5 pairs of jeans.
I own Converse.
I own a pair of high heels.
I own a leather jacket.
I have a step-relative.
I am adopted.
My biological parents are married to each other.
I am an only child.
At least one of my great-grandparents is still alive.
All of my grandparents are still alive.
I am related to someone famous.
I have a sibling who is in college
I am a twin or a triplet.
I have a sibling who is married.
I have a sibling who is less than five years old.
I have more than one sibling.
I see my cousins often.
I am married.
I am engaged.
I have been proposed to.
I have never been in a serious relationship.
I have been asked out on a date.
I have been cheated on.
I am asexual.
I want to get married someday.
I want to have kids someday.
I have children.
I have made out with someone against a wall.
I am lactose intolerant.
I have a food allergy.
Someone in my family has died of cancer.
I have had surgery.
I have scoliosis.
I take anti-depressants.
I have attempted suicide.
I have been in the hospital in the past year.
I have broken a bone.
I have had strep throat.
I don’t drink enough water.
I exercise for more than 10 hours a week.
I wear glasses and/or contacts.
I have a best friend.
I am friends with a pair of twins.
I am close friends with at least one of my neighbors.
I have at least one friend who lives in a different country.
I have had a near-death experience.
The police have been summoned to my house.
I have been nearly run over by some sort of large vehicle.
I have been snorkeling.
I have been to at least 2 weddings.
I have been to at least 2 funerals.
I have(attempted to go to) an overnight summer camp.
I have been on a train.
I have lived in a different country.
I have spent the night in a motel.
I have written a novel.
I have been zip-lining.
I have been to a wedding or funeral outside of my home country.
I have failed a class.
I have cut class.
I have gotten a speeding ticket.
I have gotten a parking ticket.
I have been in a car crash.
I have been sent to the principal’s office.
I have been arrested.
I have been drunk.
I have taken a ballet class.
I have driven a car.
I have been on an upside-down roller coaster.
I have gone to school or work after a sleepless night.
I have flown in a hot-air balloon.
I have spent more than 48 hours without sleep.
I have been in a talent show.
I have read Sherlock Holmes.
I have read all of the Harry Potter books.
I have seen all of the Harry Potter movies.
I saw the last Harry Potter movie in theaters.
I have thrown up on a plane.
I have worn my pajamas out in public.
I have worn my hair in a fishtail braid.
I have never been trick-or-treating.
I have posted a video on YouTube.
I have seen an episode of Supernatural.
I have worn colored contacts before.
I have tried out for a sports team.
I have auditioned for a play.
I have been in a school play.
I have had a main role in a school play.
I have a job.
I am afraid of heights.
I am not religious.
I live in an apartment.
I am extremely familiar with jet lag.
I want to change my name.
My first name ends with the letter “A.”
I don’t get nervous before making a presentation.
I have more than one citizenship.
I was born in a city.
I run a video blog.
I know what I want to do with my life.
I am insecure about my voice.
I worry a lot about my future.
I am a student.
I go to a private school.
I have my Master’s degree.
I have taken a college-level class while in high school.
I have graduated from high school.
I have been to a third-world country.
I have been to the Carribean.
I have been to Boston.
I have visited a college.
I have been to Florida.
I have been to New York City.
I have visited another country.
I have been to Egypt.
I am fluent in more than one language.
I have read a book in another language.
I can braid hair.
I can do a cartwheel.
I can do a handstand underwater.
I play Skyrim.
I play Minecraft.
I like country music.
I like to read fanfiction.
I watch Doctor Who.
I enjoy hiking.
I run track.
I like cooking shows.
I like chick flicks.
I love poetry.
I have written a song.
I am interested in cinematography.
Likes and Dislikes:
I like lobster.
I like strawberries.
I hate making my bed.
I enjoy science fiction.
I like roller coasters.
I like watermelon.
I liked going back-to-school shopping.
I go to the movies at least once a month.
I continuously bite my nails.
I have a habit of biting my lip.
I tap my foot when I’m nervous.
I have a paper calendar on my wall.
I often have to replace my earbuds.
Holy shit. I’ve got ASMR.
I spent so long trying to figure out what that weird tingly peaceful feeling was when I watched certain things. Like that scene in Mary Poppins where she’s giving the kids their medicine, those few seconds of spoons filling were just the most amazing things because it made me feel amazing (There’s also the Lesbomancy scene in the Witcher 2, the kazoo bit and the woman with the light bed in that one episode of Penn and Teller’s Bullshit on New Age medicine, also all of Bob Ross if anyone else was looking for more). But no one knew what I was talking about so I gave up trying to figure it out.
I watched this Cracked video today about types of videos the internet has too much of and the guy brought up ASMR trigger videos. I’d never heard of them before but then he sort of explained what ASMR was and I quickly googled to see for myself and holy shit it was like a lightbulb went on.
Here’s a link to a few tests, see if you get any nice tingles too. http://www.asmrlab.com/common-asmr-triggers/
i have limited sympathy for people who get told “no” after a public proposal because public proposals are pretty much emotionally abusive
if you think it’s kinda cute, you can discuss it beforehand and then do a staged one later
but putting someone on the spot in front of a crowd of strangers (or worse, friends) and demanding they give you a yes or no answer to a complex question which will affect the rest of their life is
really not okay
I got Spider-Man!
SO THERE’S THAT.
Mystic and Superman…. o_O…. sure quiz, sure.
ahahahahahaha I got LOKI and THOR. :P
HAHA! I also got Loki and Thor.
Loki and Iron Man. Are we talking threeway? Cause I’m cool with that.
Dragon Age Inquisition comes out on my birthday, if they stick with that release date. I find this significant.
When you send a girl home from school because her shorts or too short, or her clothing is immodest, you are telling her that hiding her body is more important than her education. You are telling her that making sure the boys have a distraction-free learning environment is more important than her education. In a way, you’re telling her that the boys are more entitled to an education than she is, and that isn’t acceptable.
I (27/M) am not happy with the “open” part of my open relationship with girlfriend (25/F). Together 2 years, “open” 6ish mo.
How we met: We met about 2.5 years ago on OkCupid. She lived close, we met up and got on well. After a few months we decided to get together. We were not open at this point. The relationship was great emotionally. She was sweet, attentive, caring and supportive. We also had a lot in common and had fun together, which is what I lacked in previous relationships so I was keen to keep this one and still am.
Becoming open: Around 6-7 months ago give or take, I found myself feeling disconnected from her and the relationship. I was looking at other women quite a bit, and couldn’t seem to stop even though I DID feel guilty. I ended up singing up to a sex-themed website (fetlife.com). This is NOT a dating website, I wasn’t planning to cheat when I signed up, it’s more a social network and I was mainly interested in looking at pictures posted there.
When I was on this website it was like I found what I thought I was missing. Loads of hot girls, who seemed happy to interact with me, mainly. I started commenting on pictures and girls started talking, flirting with me. I knew things were getting inappropriate for the relationship but I couldn’t stop. I really wanted to hook up and date again, and experience these other women.
Not meaning offense to my girlfriend, but she’s a big girl (had been since I dated her though so I didn’t feel it was my place to say anything) and while I enjoyed her body, I can’t deny that the draw of all the hotter women on the website who were seemingly interested in me was too much and I was feeling more and more disconnected from my relationship with this gaping hole in my needs not being met. I still loved my girlfriend and she fulfilled me emotionally, but physically my desires were completely elsewhere. Eventually I realised that the best thing for me to do would be to open up the relationship or break up with my girlfriend.
I spoke to her about this and, well, it broke her heart at the time. She was sobbing on me the whole night of me talking to her about it, saying she wanted to be monogamous and she didn’t like the thought of an open relationship at all. She asked for a couple of weeks to think about it, which happened, but when we spoke about it again she told me she still didn’t want to do it. I had to tell her at this point it was this or break up as I didn’t feel fulfilled. At this, she said okay, she would try the open relationship.
So, in short, she agreed to the open relationship even though she hated the idea as she didn’t want to break up. She wanted to know how an open relationship worked so I set down a few ground rules and boundaries which we both agreed to. Mainly things like.. sleep with whoever you want whenever you want, but always with protection. Casual dating is allowed as long as the person you’re dating knows the situation (since it’s hard to sleep with someone without a date first). Our relationship shouldn’t suffer and we still need to be there for each other. etc.
My Problem. Less than two months later from this, she’s signed up on FetLife too and now 100% enjoying herself. There are men crawling all over her, her profile, her pictures she’s put up. I know for a fact that she’s been on a heck of a lot of dates, both with people from the website and off it, and I also know she’s been intimate with many of them too (I keep seeing comments on her pictures saying vulgar things like ‘God I miss my mouth around those beautiful breasts’ etc from other men who I know she has been on dates with..)
Me, on the other hand? I’ve not hooked up with anyone, and only had one date. All the women who seemed to be interested in me turned out to only want to flirt online and only wanted attention, and when I brought up meeting up with any of them I got rejected. The only women who wanted to at all meet me or go out with me I wasn’t attracted to. I went out with one local girl from Fetlife just to give it a chance, because my own girlfriend had found so many dates/hookups, but I just couldn’t bring myself to be attracted and nothing happened. I havn’t been able to find anyone else who wants to sleep with me off the website either. Me and my girlfriend still date and sleep together of course, but besides that I’m completely dry. I don’t think this is at all fair on me considering how many dates she’s been on and I imagine how many guys she’s fucked.
It got worse recently. Just this past Friday night I go out to the late night shop, and on the main road I find my girlfriend standing outside a pub with a guy, holding hands and making out. He was at least 6’4, muscles everywhere you look, arms covered in tattoos (which I know my girlfriend likes). I feel like shit. My girlfriend sees me, immediately breaks away from him and comes over smiling all over her face. She hugs me, kisses me, then the guy comes and introduces himself. It was awkward as fuck honestly, but my girlfriend didn’t seem to notice at all. After stupid chitchat I tell them I need to get going, at which my girlfriend tells me she loves me, kisses me and that she will text me the next day as she wanted a date with me the next night. She then says she’s going to go into the pub to visit the bathroom, and asked her “date” to wait outside for her and then after they’ll “get going” (back to her place I assume..).
So I start to walk away as she goes into the pub to the bathroom, and I hear the guy say “Hey” behind me. I swear he had the biggest shit eating grin all over his fucking face. He said to me “Mate, you’re a better guy than I am. If I had a lady like that I wouldn’t let anyone else touch her. Lucky for me you guys have this open thing going on”. He said it like he was pretending to be friendly, but obviously it was a dig because he could tell I wasn’t happy right then. I just nodded and walked off.
My girlfriend rang me Saturday afternoon and I told her what happened and what the guy said, but she swears that he was just being complimentary/polite to me and that he’s from FetLife, and knows all about our relationship and my own profile on there which is why he was chatting to me. I told her that I still thought his comment was inappropriate and that I didn’t want her dating this guy again, to which she said ‘Okay’ but she obviously wasn’t happy about it. I didn’t ask if they had hooked up, because I could already tell they had with how she was all over him. I told her I didn’t feel like I wanted to hangout that night. She hasn’t contacted me since then.
I feel like utter shit. I’m going to be honest and say I have no idea why a guy like that is interested in my girlfriend and not out with a hot girl. I had no idea my girlfriend would get this much attention and it makes me feel like shit. I now realise if it’s not this guy, it’s going to be another with his hands all over my girlfriend. She has guys all over her, most likely just using her, but most of them more attractive than me and god knows what else………… and I only manage to get one date with someone I wasn’t even attracted to. I still feel unfulfilled.
I’m on her FetLife profile now while writing this and I have to look at this shit every day, and her relishing in it without ANY thought to my lack of dates. Not once has she asked me about my dates or who I’ve met off FetLife, and it’s obvious my profile is barren of any interaction compared to hers.
I can’t really fault the relationship I have with my girlfriend if I’m honest. She’s still her sweet, supportive self and she does make time for me, but I feel this open relationship has gotten really unfair now.
So that’s it. I don’t want to break up with her but I want it to stop, and to close the relationship again. But because it was my idea to open it, and we went through that difficulty before she started enjoying it, I don’t know how to bring it up or what I say when I do. I just know it’s got to stop now and this can’t be healthy for either of us.
tl;dr: Asked my girlfriend for an open relationship so we could both date and sleep with other people. My girlfriend has been on way too many dates and I’m sure she’s hooked up with a good few too. I havn’t. Feel the open relationship has gotten way too unfair towards me and I want to close it, but because it was my idea I don’t know how to bring it up to her. Need advice on how to do this and close the relationship again.
I cannot stop laughing at this shitstain. I hope his girlfriend leaves him forever.
omg, you should have seen my face reading this.
Only the fact that I’m at work, in a shared office, is keeping me from actually laughing like that out loud right this second.
Whiny boys who demand “open” relationships and then get butthurt when their girlfriends take advantage of that arrangement to enjoy themselves will never not be hilarious. Shoulda thought this through first, genius.
THATS WHAT YOU GET YOU PIECE OF SHIT
oh my god
*cackles* *Banshee screeches* Pressuring and shaming women into situations they are uncomfortable with only to have it all blow up in your face. IN YOUR FAAAACE you piece of human garbage. I will be laughing for the next hundred years. I hope you are forever fucking alone, ya scumsucking shitstain. Hahahahhahaa
yeah not sorry I’m gonna fuckin’ laugh my arse off at this one.
He then replies to some comments with: ’I’m starting to realise that other people on reddit view me as a selfish hypocritical prick, but I don’t think I am.’ And when someone suggested that he might be wrong he replied ‘I wont lie. Some things have hit close to home but mostly I think people are just being unnecessary and refusing to see things from my point of view.’
I’m not usually one for schadenfreude, but dear god, does this asshole’s misery make me happy.
1. Who was the last person you held hands with?
2. Are you outgoing or shy?
3. Are you easy to get along with?
Most people say I am.
4. What kind of people are you attracted to?
Educated, clever, mature, kind and people with a good sense of humor.
5. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?
Uh. Richard Speight Jr maybe.
6. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?
7. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?
I don’t remember. I avoid deep conversations.
8. What does the most recent text that you sent say?
'Easter egg hunt with 500 kids, kill me.' Tells you how long ago it was since I last texted.
9. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?
Glass Heart Hymn by Paper Route.
Ride This Out by Imaginary Cities.
Burn by Ellie Goulding.
Chealsea Hotel No. 2 by Lana Del Rey.
American Dream by Electric Guest.
10. Do you like it when people play with your hair?
Depends on the person.
11. Do you believe in luck and miracles?
12. What good thing happened this summer?
Summer just started, nothing sticks out about the last.
13. Do you think there is life on other planets?
Yes, but not in the aliens sense.
14. Do you still talk to your first crush?
15. Do you like bubble baths?
16. Do you like your neighbors?
17. What are you bad habits?
I pick my lip until it bleeds a lot. I eat dairy even though I’m lactose intolerant. Lots of other little stuff.
18. Where would you like to travel?
The UK and Ireland again.
19. Do you have trust issues?
20. Favorite part of your daily routine?
Going to bed.
21. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?
22. What do you do when you wake up?
Cuddle with the cats, have coffee, check my email.
23. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?
Uh, my face is a little darker than the rest of me because of my freckles and sun exposure. I wouldn’t mind it matching the rest of me better.
24. Who are you most comfortable around?
I’m not even comfortable with myself.
25. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?
26. Do you ever want to get married?
27. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?
Yes, it’s about 2’ long.
28. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?
Colin O’Donoghue and Mylene Jampanoi.
29. Spell your name with your chin.
30. Do you play sports? What sports?
I’m an intellectual not an athlete. Or that was what I told my PE teachers.
31. Would you rather live without TV or music?
32. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?
33. What do you say during awkward silences?
Silence sort of implies silence
34. Describe your dream girl/guy?
That should be person. Uh, someone easy going who likes to laugh but knows when to be serious. Well educated. Cat lover. Patient and tolerant. I’ve not thought much about it.
35. What are your favorite stores to shop in?
Bed, Bath and Beyond. Pier 1. Barnes & Noble. Teavana. Urban Arts and Crafts. World Market.
36. What do you want to do after high school?
I graduated from college with a BA a while ago.
37. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?
It depends. Rapists don’t.
38. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean?
It’s a day that ends in y.
39. Do you smile at strangers?
If it’s appropriate for the situation.
40. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?
Neither sound great.
41. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?
Usually hunger, or thirst. Or even an unhappy cat.
42. What are you paranoid about?
My apathy, but I find I don’t care as much as I used to. (I love that joke)
43. Have you ever been high?
44. Have you ever been drunk?
45. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?
I am not answering that.
46. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?
Gray? It’s been years.
47. Ever wished you were someone else?
All the time.
48. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?
That I wasn’t anemic.
49. Favourite makeup brand?
Uh, I like Hard Candy primer. I usually just wear that and eyeliner and concealer these days.
50. Favourite store?
Don’t really have one.
51. Favourite blog?
drawsshits is entertaining
52. Favourite colour?
53. Favourite food?
Potatoes, no matter what you do with them.
54. Last thing you ate?
55. First thing you ate this morning?
That doughnut and sprinkles cereal from Capt’n Crunch
56. Ever won a competition? For what?
I don’t remember.
57. Been suspended/expelled? For what?
Not doing school work.
58. Been arrested? For what?
59. Ever been in love?
60. Tell us the story of your first kiss?
I’d rather not.
61. Are you hungry right now?
Not feeling like I’m up for eating.
62. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?
I don’t have any tumblr friends.
63. Facebook or Twitter?
Fuck them both.
64. Twitter or Tumblr?
65. Are you watching tv right now?
66. Craving something? What?
67. What colour are your towels?
I don’t have a matching set, so lots of different colors.
68. How many pillows do you sleep with?
69. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
No. I have cats that sleep with me.
70. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?
4. All sentimental keepsakes. I got rid of the others.
71. Favourite animal?
72. What colour is your underwear?
73. Chocolate or Vanilla?
74. Favourite ice cream flavour?
Bailey’s Irish Cream .
75. What colour shirt are you wearing?
76. What colour pants?
77. Favourite tv show?
At the moment, Game Of Thrones.
78. Favourite movie?
Mon Oncle, They Live By Night or Harvey.
79. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?
80. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?
81. Favourite character from Mean Girls?
I didn’t care for that movie.
82. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?
I have no idea, I don’t even remember the movie.
83. First person you talked to today?
84. Last person you talked to today?
85. Name a person you hate?
86. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?
My sister in law.
87. In a fight with someone?
88. How many sweatpants do you have?
89. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?
No hoodies, but 6-7 sweaters.
90. Last movie you watched?
91. Favourite actress?
92. Favourite actor?
93. Do you tan a lot?
94. Have any pets?
95. How are you feeling?
96. Do you type fast?
Speed is relative.
97. Do you regret anything from your past?
98. Can you spell well?
99. Do you miss anyone from your past?
100. Ever been to a bonfire party?
I get the feeling that with all the UK spellings this might mean a Bonfire Night party. In that case no, but I’ve been to a party where there was one.
101. Ever broken someone’s heart?
102. Have you ever been on a horse?
103. What should you be doing?
Drinking my tea.
104. Is something irritating you right now?
105. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?
It didn’t last long.
106. Do you have trust issues?
No, do you have memory issues?
107. Who was the last person you cried in front of?
I don’t remember.
108. What was your childhood nickname?
M. Emmy. Smartass. MarieTard
109. Have you ever been out of your province/state?
Yes, of course.
110. Do you play the Wii?
I did when my brother had one.
111. Are you listening to music right now?
Yes. (I Just) Died In Your Arms by Cutting Crew.
112. Do you like chicken noodle soup?
113. Do you like Chinese food?
Very, very much.
114. Favourite book?
Too many to choose from.
115. Are you afraid of the dark?
116. Are you mean?
117. Is cheating ever okay?
If fidelity is a part of your commitment to someone then it isn’t. If you have an open relationship then it isn’t cheating.
118. Can you keep white shoes clean?
I don’t have white shoes.
119. Do you believe in love at first sight?
120. Do you believe in true love?
121. Are you currently bored?
No, and I have little to no respect for anyone who announces when they are.
122. What makes you happy?
123. Would you change your name?
No, I’ve accepted how long and unusual it is.
124. What your zodiac sign?
125. Do you like subway?
The deli, yes. Indifferent to actual subways.
126. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?
I believe he’s into dudes.
127. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?
Not this again.
128. Favourite lyrics right now?
Just as I thought it was going alright
I find out I’m wrong when I thought I was right
s’always the same, it’s just a shame, that’s all
I could say day, you’d say night
tell me it’s black when I know that it’s white
s’always the same, it’s just a shame, that’s all - That’s All by Genesis
129. Can you count to one million?
I’m sure I could, but I’m not interested.
130. Dumbest lie you ever told?
I’m not sure.
131. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?
Closed, I always keep it closed or it sounds like the rest of the house is in my bedroom.
132. How tall are you?
133. Curly or Straight hair?
It’s got a soft wave.
134. Brunette or Blonde?
Red Head please.
135. Summer or Winter?
136. Night or Day?
137. Favourite month?
138. Are you a vegetarian?
139. Dark, milk or white chocolate?
140. Tea or Coffee?
141. Was today a good day?
142. Mars or Snickers?
I’ve not seen a Mars bar in years.
143. What’s your favourite quote?
"And thus I clothe my naked villany
With odd old ends stol’n out of holy writ,
And seem a saint, when most I play the devil.”
Richard III, Richard III.
144. Do you believe in ghosts?
145. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?
B. En lisant. (Old French textbook from college.)